Food and Me
My Food Story
I was raised eating meat. My mom cooked for us, so we always ask her to cook whatever we like. I liked sweets a lot because when i was bored it made me feel good. She cooked me sweets that i liked. I used to eat sweets made out of sticky rice and coconut milk wrapped in banana leaf. I also ate a lot of cakes, from purple yam cakes, mango cakes, crema de la fruta, brazo de mercedes, sansrival and many others. When i got married and had a kid, i attended a cooking class to learn how to cook cakes and sweets. Every family member became happy because i cooked and everyone ate and we had fun. That was the life that i had that revolved around eating. I was directed by my desire for food - but did not know nor did i understand why.
One day, i attended a vegetarian lunch, and they started talking about being healthy through adopting a vegetarian diet. I tasted the food on the table as we were having lunch. It tasted bland but my fears of sickness and death came out. So, i started questioning why i eat what i eat. I know i fear getting sick. That was when i decided to be vegetarian.
I tested the vegetarian diet for 29 years as i did yoga and meditation for that long. In that time span i cooked my food from the starting point of - wanting to be healthy and not wanting to get sick (which was also me existing within fear of death) plus me not wanting to kill animals for food because i wanted to stop people from killing animals.
When i started to research more about food, i saw that there were people adopting a raw food lifestyle. It sounded good at that time. I became Raw Vegan when i tasted the brownie a la mode in one of the restaurants in Los Angeles. It tasted good.
After my raw food adventure - or in between - I did Juice Feasting by just drinking fruit juices with greens when i saw that there were people doing it and saying they were becoming healthy. I was mesmerized by diets talking about how i can be healthy.
I then tried the Fruitarian Diet because i saw someone from the internet surviving by just eating fruits. He looked healthy and happy according to my own definition of what happy and healthy mean - so i tried it.
I thought that was evolving as the personality, and that i am making myself better by going to the best diet. I researched in the internet. I found out about inedia (not eating). I believed the only thing left for me to try is breatharianism or not eating. So, tried not eating for 3 and a half consecutive days. In the beginning i felt like dying, but in the second and third days, it felt good. The body seemed to adjust completely to not having food. That made my food journey complex because i was testing eating and not eating and all of that made me feel okay - when in fact i was testing 2 different things - which is opposite each other.
It was when i did my Food Mind Construct, when i realized what was really going on.
I saw FOOD separate from me . I saw food as something which will make me feel better and which will make me healthy rather than see it as a way to assist my body.
Effective nutrition is needed by the body. The mind feeds off the body's energy, so we have to stop mind chatter - as emotions, feelings, thoughts etc. - otherwise the nutrition the body gets will just be wasted. I am using tools that work to stop my mind chatter.
I also found out that i as the ego-personality can manifest my beliefs about food - and make it real even if it is not real - so i started stopping my beliefs about food using self-forgiveness and self-correction.
Website
===
